| 
Subscribe: “I felt so bad. I used to cry in bed. I made it a point to cry only at 11 p.m. up, when my child was asleep. I did not want him to see me cry. But once, on January 26, I thought he was already asleep when I started crying. It was already 11:30 p.m. when my child sat up and said to me, ‘You don’t have to marry Papa if you’re not happy.’ I was taken aback. I did not know why he said that.”
“Then, the situation became clear to me. My child said he saw his father hit me. All the while, I thought I was keeping it a secret from my son — the fact that his father was beating me. All this time, my child knew.”
She once was told that battering inside the family will breed another set of batterers that will take generations to break. Sarah realized that she did not want her child growing up to see his father beating her up.
“I looked for signs — at the Church, at the cemetery. I talked to my grandfather who is dead. But I was struck by the wisdom of my six-year-old child. Why would I build a family, where I’d only be beaten and abused?”
Finally, it was this wisdom from a child that gave her the strength to face the future. She told her mother all about the abuse, at last, and she finally decided to cancel the wedding.
Her mother was shocked. Later, her mother would tell her about the cycle that survivors of violence like her undergo in the hands of their batterer. “After beating you up, he would beg, he would be so sweet when he’d beg that you’d patch up. There will be a lull after that, which they call the honeymoon phase. Then after a while, he’d beat you again. He’d beg again and the cycle keeps repeating over and over,” her mother said.
Now, trying to shake off the nightmare, Sarah tries to look forward to her future. “For the sake of my child, who had given me that rare wisdom, I’m trying to start a new life — free from the violence I suffered,” she said. “It was my child who helped me discern the important steps I’m taking now and I’m very proud of him.” (Germelina A. Lacorte/davaotoday.com)
[tags]domestic violence, spousal abuse, battered wives, abusive relationships[/tags]
NPA releases Special Forces army officer as ‘goodwill gesture’
You must be logged in to post a comment.